No More Excuses

...well, at least that's what I'm trying to hum to myself all day. I hear the words in my head, but I don't feel like the rest of me (mind and body) are buying it quite yet.

My day started off with an internal conversation I was having... I managed to get up shortly after my alarm went off, with the intention of packing my kids clothes for the day, and working on a school post. All was accomplished, and I felt really good for FINALLY being able to get up when I wanted to. And so the conversation in my head began... Mostly questions, but an AH-HA resulted from it.

Me to Self: "Why haven't you been able to do this [getting up early] lately? Why is running the only thing you will make time to do, when you actually WANT to make time for exercise? Why has my motivation been external in the past, i.e., training for a raise, trying to lose weight to look good, keeping up with my friends, etc.? Why should I workout and get healthy now? Who am I doing this for?"

The line of questions churned in my mind through my morning routine, and by the time I was out of the shower (where many of moments of clarity happen!), I heard the words in my head: NO MORE EXCUSES. No more being too tired... no more too much work to get to my goal... no more being unhappy with what I see in the mirror. Just NO MORE. In that moment, I realized the reason why I have trained for so many races in the last year or more. It is because even though I am not a big fan of race training, the commitment I have made to entering the race (paying the registration is a big one!) has been a driving force behind keeping me going. That sense of accomplishment when I log miles and feel that I'm getting somewhere was a good motivation.

I discovered that I have been creating barriers around myself that are keeping me from exercising. I have been so worried about getting anxious with overloading my plate, that the one thing that keeps my anxiety down is what has been sacrificed. So with that... I decided this morning that I am going to pick one of the MANY races I have had my eye on for this year, and register. I need something to work towards, and if this is what it takes, then so be it. I didn't register for races because I was afraid between work, school, and kids, training would just be too much. But I know that I need this... and that I don't have to win a gold medal, even if I walk part of any race. The point is just to FINISH..... but first, I've got to START.

mrv ;-)

The Power of Perseverance

As I was reading Bob Gass this morning, I found his devotional to be applicable to our journey of attaining and maintaing a healthy lifestyle.

Enjoy...

 

“Let us not grow weary while doing good.” Gal 6:9 NKJV

                                                  

                                                 THE POWER OF PERSEVERANCE

One of the great themes of the Bible is- perseverance. Paul, who refused to quit, wrote: “Let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart.” Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “The great majority of men are bundles of beginnings.” Are you merely a starter, or are you also a finisher? When the enthusiasm for a new idea fades, when the odds against you increase and the results diminish, when it looks as if success is impossible, you must keep forging ahead. Admiral Robert Peary attempted to reach the North Pole seven times before he finally succeeded. Oscar Hammerstein produced five shows on Broadway that were flops before staging Oklahoma, which was seen by almost five million people during a record-breaking run of 2,212 performances. Quitting is more about who you are, than where you are or what you’re up against. We all have our excuses. The truth is, external things don’t stop us; it’s what happens to us on the inside! Most of us stop ourselves from reaching our potential. We can pretend that people, things, and situations outside of ourselves are to blame, but in reality most failures are just the result of a lack of bulldog-like tenacity. Leonardo da Vinci said, “Obstacles cannot crush me. Every obstacle yields to stern resolve. He who is fixed on a star, does not change his mind.” You must have a mindset to tenaciously pursue your dream. The only guarantee for failure is to stop trying. There is no insurmountable barrier, except your own inherent lack of purpose and persistence.

All my love,
LJ

The Front Office Challenge

This was typed at work today, but I never got a chance to post it in our blog!

Thursday, January 26, 2012

01:13:58 PM

Funny how things work.... just this morning, I hit the snooze button on my alarm clock for a good hour before I finally got out of bed.  Consequently, I was running late.  I got the kids dropped off, and got to work on time.  While driving to work, I couldn't help but think about how my old morning routine has been completely thrown off course over the last year.  Most of my life, I was always that person that always had a desire to be able to wake up at 5am to get a good workout in before work.  But I felt like I was never wired that way... I love my sleep and have never been good at getting out of bed in the morning.  I'm not exactly one of those people that can immediately open my eyes and spring out of bed the moment the alarm goes off.  OH how I wish I could!  Anyways, so when I started my Masters' program last year, I needed that extra hour in the morning to get my school work done.  Funny how work or school work can motivate me to get out of bed at 5am, but exercising does not.  I've noticed since the holidays that my alarm still goes off at 4:45, but I haven't been getting up any earlier than 5:30a on some days, and it's getting worse.  I've lost track of my purpose for getting up that early to begin with.  When I wasn't getting up to study, I was packing my bag, and heading to work early to go for a run.  It felt great!  Granted, with the dark winter mornings, this has not been happening.

So the concern I was feeling this morning was.... after wanting to be able to get up at 5am for so long, how to I get motivated to get my body clock back in gear, before I completely lose it!  I think I got my answer.  I was approached by my colleague, and she asked me to join a team for our "Front Office Challenge" here at work.  The Front Office Challenge is a fitness challenge, in which employees form teams to exercise, log their minutes, in an effort to "beat" the front office.  The Front Office is our facility's Executive team, including the hospital Director, Deputy Director, Chief of Staff, Nurse Executive, and a few other head honchos.  When my colleague first approached me, she asked, "Michelle, have you been exercising lately?" to which I answered, "no, I haven't found the time."  She convinced me to join, and I heard myself say, "this may be the motivation I need to get back in gear." 

What is it about being committed to others that helps us stay more motivated at exercising, eating well, and all other measures of being healthy?  Why is trying this on my own so much harder?  Shouldn't I, myself, be motivation enough???  Funny how things work....

mv/mc

Healthy Lifestyle Transition Woes...

I almost had a relapse this morning. I woke up feeling blue. I was overwhelmed by my emotions, what I have to do, What I need to do, and what I am not doing plus everything in between. I woke up embittered by the last 25 pounds that I want to lose.  It was one of those mornings where I was constantly berating myself for my recent lack of exercise and poor food choices. Ironically, the more I beat myself up, the more I started eating. Counter-productive, right? Yeah, I know! So, it is time to put my big girl panties on, stop complaining, and do something!

After a few hours of self-loathing, I decided to embrace the knowledge that I am strong, capable, and living a healthy life is not just achievable for everyone else, but it is very possible for me too. I must move past my feelings, because they have never helped the numbers on the scale go down, nor does it produce a healthier lifestyle for me, per se. However, my belief in God, courage, and determination will afford me a healthier way of living :-)

Signed with Kisses,
LJ

Spiritual Vitality

I thought I would share with you a powerful affirmation that I often use when I am focusing on health and fitness by Mary Murray Shelton:

Vibrant life flows through every cell of my body.
All the organs, actions, and functions of my body are working in perfect harmony.
I love this body, and I feel its aliveness and sparkling vitality.

This speaks to the the messages (that Karen was referring to during our call with her) that we give ourselves that affects our body and how we approach life. I use nourishing thoughts as affirmations to start my day for this reason.

Another FTW!!!

Quinallison's upgrade:

Mixed greens, tuna, grape tomatoes, garbanzo beans, olives, a pinch of McCormick's Salad Seasoning, and a bit of Newman's Own Olive Oil and Vinegar =D

I'm getting more and more excited as I embark on creating yummy salad dishes. I never knew how versatile and fun putting my own salad together could be. And I never knew how delicious it would actually be either! I'm enjoying this now as I type!

I never craved salads. Except for when I used to work in the Financial District of SF and Mixt Greens was down the street from my job (mouth-watering!). For me it was always the usual: ceasar, greek, cobb, but putting together my own condiments gives me that wondrous feeling of how different and good it will taste, and what wonders it will be doing for this temple of a body!

It's hard going back to salad when you've been away cheating on the foods that you know gives you that immediate satisfaction but cannot fill that need, kinda like having that type of relationship with the person that keeps leavin' ya for someone else and then coming back! No more being your Part Time Lover junk food!



Cheers (with a glass of water) to a healthy lifestyle!

- Quinallison

This Says it All....

mc/mv

My Mind. My Body.

I noticed I've had so many questions swirling around in my head the last week or so.  And they all start with "Why?"  Why do I have so much trouble staying motivated?  Why do I NOT get motivated when I see some of my closest friends reaching new depths with their physical and nutritional fitness? 

I had two instances in the last week that really had me thinking about our inquiry, and made me focus on my own reactions and thoughts/feelings about what I was encountering.  The first was one day on FaceBook.  I "Liked" a new page that a girlfriend of mine was promoting for her friend, and turns out that it was another acquaintance of mine.  The page had to do with being inspired to be physically fit, weight loss goals, etc.  As I started reading some of the posts about "Thanks for the inspiration.  I lifted a 100 lb kettle bell today!" or "This is great!  My 7 mile run is going to lead to a marathon!"  I couldn't help but cringe!  And it wasn't because doing those activities sound horrible to me, but just the fact that I know some of these people, and was slightly jealous of their accomplishments.  Terrible as it sounds, I have to admit that I felt like this so I can figure out why I felt this way.  As a friend, I know I should just be happy, but I think part of me is slightly resentful of the fact that I used to be that super-fit person.  Why have I let so much of my life get in the way of getting healthy and fit, and how do I get that motivation back?

The second incident was when I had a conversation with a relative of mine.  She was diagnosed with depression for about a year ago, and has dealt with weight issues as a result of the medication she's been taking.  We talked about some of the things that were uncovered in her therapy sessions, and how there is so much hurt and anger she has been holding inside over the course of her lifetime.  This really triggered some thoughts in my own mind, and forced me to start reflecting on how some of my own experiences have caused me to hold in ill feelings as well.  I'm wondering if tapping into some of this "stuff" that's locked up inside is what is literally weighing me down from being more active.

mc/mv

Break Thru Moment

I guess I shouldn't be surprised--even after 90 lbs down--I still have these "aha" moments (has Oprah trademarked that yet, sorry if she did). This one I had when I least suspected it--again, I don't think I should have been surprised by that either.

I was in class this weekend and we were in the middle of a discussion regarding an activity we had just done. A classmate of mine (who also happens to be one of my best friends) made a comment, indirectly in response to mine. She said something along the lines of it had to do with the way she was raised and that she was raised to know that she was worth/deserving of the best (I don't want to put words in her mouth but that's what I comprehended it as). It wasn't a malicious or egotistical statement on her part at all. It made a lot of sense actually--our parent(s) want the best for us and do their best to instill that way of thinking in us. It establishes a sense of self worth. Initially I thought to myself--well my parents didn't teach me to not think that I wasn't worthy....but then I stopped. My reaction wasn't about whether or not my parents didn't raise me well--they did a great job. But at some point I got wrapped up into my own thoughts/views of myself and I began to think that I wasn't deserving. I thought/felt I wasn't deserving because of my weight. Looking back I know I was a healthy weight and just a tall kid (which is why I physically "stuck out") but then I saw being a "big kid" = being a fat kid. Which, as a teenager, grew into "I'm fat, so I don't deserve to have a boyfriend." This continued through my college years and (I recently realized) into my young adult years. My "I'm fat = I don't deserve" haunted me until Sunday when my friend made her comment and I had my epiphany. I was instantly taken back to these moments when I couldn't understand why I didn't get something that I thought I deserved and I realized that it was because I developed the mindset of "I don't deserve it because I'm fat."

WRONG! You (and I) deserve anything that you/I rightly work to earn--whether that's a compliment, a raise, a new car, a weight loss, etc. I now understand why I never take compliments, b/c I never thought I deserved them. I now understand why I absorbed and held onto all the negative in my life--b/c I thought I deserved it.

This is coming from a woman who's always (I think so) stood confidently in her beliefs, values, and individuality. But what I realized that day was that it wasn't my parent's fault or wrong doing and that I deserve anything that I rightfully and honestly strive for!

I had more "ahas" that day as we followed that discussion up with a guided meditation--I realized that I have a whole "junk drawer/closet" of things I need to address/face still. It's those things that we put aside and say that we'll get to it later. Then later comes and goes and it all begins to pile up, we stick it somewhere that's around but out of sight. I know that I carry stuff about my mom's passing still, about my childhood, about jobs I've had/lost/never had, about a lot of things. Just when you think you've cleaned up you remember that proverbial junk drawer--well now is the time to either deal with it or continue to carry the burden. That day I decided to start to deal with it. Create the keep, dump, donate piles and move up and on with life--my life!

I post this here b/c we need to realize that those items weigh more than we think. They add on LBS just like a pint of Ben & Jerry's can. In fact, more often than not, they are the reason we turn to Ben & Jerry instead of the issue itself. I'm not advising you take on the whole drawer today--but open it, take a good look at it, and decide what you will pull out to work on first. It will make a HUGE difference.

Good decision FTW!

Quinallison here with my first blog for my Collaborative Inquiry group at St. Marys' Masters in Leadership program! I'm excited to post a pretty awesome last minute creation of a salad I made today at work! Here's the scoop...

Tuna, grape tomatoes, and celery (and a bit of pepper and salt). Bon appetit Q!

As simple and as common sense this may be to a regular cook, I'm pretty proud of this last minute concoction upon arrival to my office. I wasn't feeling all too well this morning so I stayed in for a bit to make sure I wasn't pushing myself to hard since I was having some health issues this past week. Time was flying by and I had to make an 11:30 appointment. Halfway through my trip I realized I forgot to bring my leftovers to have for lunch today. Bah!!

When I got back to the office I started working and thinking about what can I quick grab around here to munch on. I needed something a bit hardy since tonight is hockey night, and fueling my system is essential! However I couldn't leave the office right away since I needed to catch up on a few things and once I get into a working groove I can't stop till I'm done.

I knew I had a few things in the fridge: tomatoes, celery and cottage cheese. In my drawer I had a can of tuna, a can of garbanzo beans, pita chips and peanut butter. I usually like celery and peanut butter for a snack so I thought I'd save that for later. I wondered if just having plain tuna, tomatoes and celery would work? So I tried it and voila, a very nice healthy, light but surprisingly filling dish of a simple salad. I never knew I could mix such ingredients like that! Mind you, I'm only a rookie cook!

I would have added garbanzo beans but I thought to save that for another salad day. I still have more celery sticks which I'll be snacking on with a bit of peanut butter later, yum. I'm hoping to keep up this trend of  healthy eating. Don't get me wrong, I won't stray away from the junk food I love, but I do want to keep that consumption at a minimum. If more healthy food consumption can outweigh (pahdump pump!) junk food consumption, I can be a happy camper!

Probably the most challenging obstacles for me is emotional eating, cravings, and gluttony (sinful!!!). I can be gluttonous when it comes to eating something that is sooooooooo sooooo yummy, and when I crave something, my mood will not be as good until I have it. Fortunately joining my CI group will help me to overcome these problems and allow me to make better choices and eliminate being materialistic with food!

Cheers (with a glass of water) to a healthy lifestyle!

- Q